關於 what does abandon mean ，我們在網路上蒐集到這些相關的討論、資訊與評價

#EZTALK #你不知道的美國大小事
#燙手山芋怎麼說

美國生活用語：蔬菜篇之 potato🥔馬鈴薯

1⃣ a couch potato
2⃣ small potatoes
3⃣ hot potato
4⃣ drop sb./sth. like a hot potato
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From their native home in Peru, potatoes have spread all over the world, becoming a staple in many countries. One of those countries is the U.S., where we like to eat them boiled, baked, fried and mashed. They’ve also become part of our language, as you’ll see from the idioms below.
原生於祕魯，現在普及於全世界的馬鈴薯，已經成為許多國家的主食，其中一個國家就是美國。美國人喜歡吃水煮、烤、炸馬鈴薯，還有馬鈴薯泥。當然，potato 馬鈴薯這個字也成為美語的一部分。

What would a potato do if you put it on a couch? Well, it would just sit there doing nothing. 1⃣So a couch potato is a lazy person who just sits around watching TV. And if they sit there long enough, they may even start to look like a potato! Ex: Since Dan got Netflix, he’s turned into a real couch potato.
如果你把一棵馬鈴薯放在沙發上會發生什麼事？嗯，它就會動也不動地坐在那裡。所以 a couch potato 就是形容「一直坐在沙發上看電視的懶人」，而且如果坐得夠久，他們也會越來越像顆馬鈴薯！如：Since Dan got Netflix, he’s turned into a real couch potato.（丹自從有了網飛帳號後，就成了一顆貨真價實的沙發馬鈴薯。）

Americans like to eat big Idaho potatoes—the bigger the better. 2⃣So what does “small potatoes” mean? It means a tiny or insignificant person, thing or amount. Ex: Last week’s storm was small potatoes compared to the hurricane we had two years ago.
美國人愛吃愛達荷州黃褐皮馬鈴薯，越大顆越讚。所以，small potato是什麼意思呢？指的是那些「不起眼或不重要的小人物；微不足道的小事；聊勝於無的數量」。如：Last week’s storm was small potatoes compared to the hurricane we had two years ago.（跟兩年前的颶風比起來，上禮拜的暴風雨根本只是小意思。）

When you bake a potato, you have to be careful when taking it out of the oven because it may be too hot to handle. As an idiom, 3⃣ a “hot potato” is a difficult or controversial issue that people avoid dealing with or discussing. Ex: Gun control is a political hot potato in the U.S.
當你烤好一顆馬鈴薯，你必須小心翼翼把它拿出烤箱，因為它會燙到你幾乎無法拿。因此hot potato在諺語中就是指「燙手山芋，難以處理或具爭議性的議題」，大家都不想碰觸或討論。如：Gun control is a political hot potato in the U.S.（槍枝管制在美國一直是燙手山芋。）

The phrase “hot potato” also appears in another idiom with a different meaning: 4⃣ “drop sb./sth. like a hot potato,” which means to abandon someone or something as quickly as possible, usually to avoid potential problems. Ex: Kim dropped her boyfriend like a hot potato when she found out he had a criminal record.
hot potato也出現在另一組諺語中，不過意思完全不一樣：drop sb./sth. like a hot potato，這個諺語是指「在事情變大條之前，儘快擺脫某人或某事」，如：Kim dropped her boyfriend like a hot potato when she found out he had a criminal record.（金在發現男友有前科的時候，就馬上擺脫他了。）

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整理資料發現近兩年前去某國際研討會分享 #手天使 心得時的講稿，當時把我知道的議題面向都寫進去了。貼上來給有興趣的朋友。

[[slide page 1]]
Thank you for attending this part.
I'm from Hand Angel, a non-profit organization of Taiwan.

The title of my presentation is "As a sex worker and a sex volunteer",
since I'm both a sex worker, and also attending Hand Angel as a sex volunteer.

[[slide page 2]]
Allow me to introduce my organization more,
though you may know some from what Vincent has said in the morning.

Our main tenet is sexual rights to people with disabilities.

[[slide page 3]]
This includes not only orgasm, but also the right to control one's sexuality with autonomy and without discrimination.
People know us usually because we provide limited sexual service for servere physical or visual disabilities, including females.

Hand Angel is not a registered organization in Taiwan,
since we literally provide sexual service, which is considered against public order and morals.

However, we are still able to initiative our idea on the table
because our service are free, which means we actually do not violate any law.

[[slide page 4]]
In Taiwan, the definition of "sexual transaction" includes obscene acts in exchange for monetary,
which means it's considered transactional sex even there is no sexual intercourse.
And since transactional sex is technically illegal in Taiwan,
there's no legal way for us to charge anything by providing any service which may be considered obscenity.

This is much different in other countries.
In Japan, the law prohibiting sexual transaction only applies to intercourse between one male and one female. That's why White Hands and NOIR are able to provide paid handjob. The other reason is that they seem do not locate their service as sexual transaction. We can talk about this difference later.
And in Hong Kong, there's some way for sex workers not to be punished, which is called "one-woman brothel". So the difficulty for people with disabilities to satisfy their sexual desire would be different.

I, who has been a sex worker for years -- under the table, of course -- was invited to join Hand Angel at its very beginning.
[[slide page 5]]
People keep asking me that how a sex worker would think about a free sexual service.
But before that question, I think it's more important for us to know the difference other than money.
What's the difference between a classical transactional sex and our service?

As a sex worker, I hope my customers will come back to me more and more, as many times as they can pay.
But as a member of Hand Angel, I hope the servees would not need us anymore.
In fact, I hope they don't have to come to us at the very beginning.

The reason why people with disabilities may need sexual service, is the absence of sexual resource, the resource to fulfill one's sexual desire.

This is just like other issues of disabilities.
[[slide page 6]]
Just providing a service would not resolve the structural problem.

For example, if you give food to the poor without changing their situation, you would end up finding out that they're still poor.
Now change the "food" to "sex".
If we just give our own sex to those who barely have sexual resource, we'll end up exploiting ourselves, and their bad situation still remains.

The problem is, disabled people are considered abnormal, and they have been treated as no unnecessary needs.
But what is necessary for a person to live her own life instead of just survive?
In our issue, disabled people are usually considered asexual, and seldom sexy. That's the stigma we're going to break down.

[[slide page 7]]
There are some textures talking about disabled people in love and having sex, such as "Scarlet Road", "Sex on Wheels", and "The Sessions".
However, the narrative are usually based on ableism.
Viewers usually focus on how can the service provider "bear" to have sex with disabled people, instead of seeing the obstacles disabled people encounter.

[[slide page 8]]
A feminist has said that the relationship a disabled person has is considered depending on the compassion of the other person. People think their sexuality is disgusting and only saints are able to tolerate it.

So we can see the problem is not only physical obstacles, but also how we think about intimate relationship a disabled person deserves.

[[slide page 9]]
Does Hand Angel care about intimate issue? The answer is yes.
In our service, we provide not only sexual service. Our target is not the physical orgasm, but the infinite opportunity of their own lives.
Here are two examples.

[[slide page 10]] Little Prince
Since this servee can sense nothing below his waist, a classical handjob would be meaningless.
Fortunately, we have a BDSM queen in our team.
She thought of techniques in SM to check how pain it is to the slave, and use the same trick to check how the servee's body can feel.
I have to emphasize: that was not a medical treatment, that was about communication with each other.
They were talking about the feeling of two people, instead of the body of one person.
The whole process relies on the intimacy between the sex volunteer and the servee.

[[slide page 11]] ND
"Strolling" for him was from his room to the front door of his home.
Uh, I'm not talking about he lives in a big house.
Though using an electric wheelchair, ND's finger was not powerful enough to control the device for more than 10 minutes,
which means going out alone is not possible for him.
But after applying for our service, he trained himself to "walk" longer.
Even after our service, we were told that he kept trying to leave home and meet other friends.

Another servee has tried other entertainment such as snorkeling and paragliding after our service.
He's having a more plentiful life than before, and even than me.

[[slide page 12]]
In these cases, we can see that:
First, physical orgasm is not the only purpose of a sexual service.
Secondly, libido, or desire for sexual activity, is a strong energy for people to live.

There's a continuing question for us: People can still live without sex.
[[slide page 13]]
What's so important for disabled people to have sex?
Well, I think sex is probably not important for those who can have sex easily, but the impossibility to sex or intimacy may deny the self-esteem of a person.
Sex is an important reason for most people to make friends. So on the other hand, once a person is forced to abandon the opportunity to have sex, she (or he) might lose the energy to social activities. And that's not good for mental health.

[[slide page 14]] The 3 aspects we care about
First, physical orgasm. This is not only about sex organ, but also those come from your erogenous zone.
The problem is not only that people don't know how to interact with disabled people during sex,
but also that people do not want to know how the sex would be for people with different disabilities.

Second, intimacy. The right to have a satisfying date is also important.
Let's imagine, what if a couple of lovers want to kiss each other while seeing movie in a theater, but one of them is in wheelchair so their positions are actually separated?

Third, social integration. Many people with disabilities don't have enough opportunity to make close friends. One of the reasons is that other people usually don't know how to react with disabled people. Therefore, education is important.

[[slide page 15]] Gender Equity Education
In Taiwan, gender equity education comprises 3 parts: affective education, sex education, and gay and lesbian education.
Though I also want to introduce the situation that the conservative group is raising a proposal of referendum to forbid gay and lesbian education, but that's not the issue here so I have to skip that. I hope people who are interested in Taiwan may notice that same-sex marriage is not the only issue about gender equity.

Uh, back to disability rights movement.
As an organization which cares both gender issue and disability issue, we note that even open-minded gender activists may ignore the existence of people with disabilities.
Gender equity education is never designed or applied in the point of view of the disabled.
For example, there are some materials for teaching safe sex, but people seldom think about how a blind person should know before she (or he) masturbate or have sex.

We have a servee who once masturbated in the bathroom of his home, but couldn't clean up since not knowing where his semen reached during ejaculation, and therefore shocked his sister who later used the bathroom.
And another friend bought an artificial vagina in a sex toy store. But he didn't even know he have to erect before insertion.

[[slide page 16]] female servee
People caring about gender equity keep question us: why is there only one female servee during these 5 years after our foundation?
Well, we think the answer is complicated. But the most important one is: how difficult for a female to "confess" she has sexual desire?
We all know about "slut shaming", and those terms to humiliate females by their sexuality -- such as "bitch" and "whore".
It's difficult even for able-bodied females to state their sex experience and preference.
Then it's even more difficult for disabled females to think what she herself wants.

But before sexual activity with other people, disabled females don't even know their body well.
The only female servee we have, told us she has never seen or touched her own vagina.
So we also hosted some conferences and speeches to discuss about such situation of disabled females.

[[slide page 17]] Androcentrism
This is an important issue for us. And I think it's important for those who care about sexual health of disabled people.
Though there are some textures talking about sexual desires of disabled females. To provide sexual service or even sex education to them is barely seen.
I have to admit that, even though there are more and more female members joining us, androcentrism is still not easy to get over.

[[slide page 18]] limitations
Hand Angel provides service to those with servere physical or visual disabilities.
So here comes a frequently asked question: what about others?
The main difficulty for us is that we don't know enough about the situation of other disabilities.
Of course we know that people with other disabilities also don't have enough sexual resources,
but we ourselves do not have enough resources to share, either.
That's why we also hope other people to compose other similar organization.

Meanwhile, there are some people we cannot help because of law.
Adolescents are the ones I myself care about most,
since male teenagers have overwhelming sexual desire, and that would be hell for those with upper limb disability.

However, there are always laws prohibiting youths to have sex in every country.
[[slide page 19]]
In Taiwan, it is legal to have sexual activity after 16. No matter it's intercourse or not.
But even for an organization providing free service like us, the member who communicate with sex volunteer and the servee would be punished as a broker if the servee is younger than 18.
Actually, we do have an applier who mailed us about his desire when he was 15. What we can do is tell him to wait 3 more years.

Unfortunately, being an adult does not mean your right to sex is permitted.
[[slide page 20]]
People with intellectual disability or mental disorder are also infantilized, treated as babies or angels, and considered asexual.
The dilemma is similar to what teenagers have. Their consents are not considered valid.
That is frustrating. The law to protect them from sexual violence also tortures them.

[[slide page 21]] Acrotomophilia and devotees
While talking about disabled people in love or having sex, this is also an issue we should mention.
Some people worry about that devotees are just trying to dominate or take control of the disabled people.
This is similar to MacKinnon's dominance theory and male supremacy.
Devotees are considered to have more power in the relationship, and thus disabled people have a lack of autonomy.

I think that's a stigma, too.
The dominance theory does not deny free love. It focuses on the power issue.
Thus, the problem lies still on the absence of resources disabled people deserve.
Slanders on devotees are based on the prejudice that disabled people are never sexy,
and that denies the possibility for disabled people to have plentiful sexual activity.
The whole society shall support disabled people to have their own autonomy in their relationship.

[[slide page 22]] Difficulties
Usually, people would understand sexual desire of disabled people.
But to support it publicly is another story, especially for the organizations relying on donations.
There are some social workers and parents telling us that they want to do something to help their cases and family,
but it is still an issue which could not be spoken.
It's never been easy for us to talk about sex on the table, but it should be done.
Even for those who don't agree with the idea of sexual service, I do hope you could at least support disabled people to talk about their sex and romance.

[[slide page 23]]
This ends my report. Thank you for listening.
I'm Kong, a sex volunteer of Hand Angel from Taiwan.

God’s hand is all over Esther’s story of promotion from an ordinary Jewish orphan girl, to the queen of the mighty Persian empire.

To replace Vashti, a beauty pageant was to be prepared and conducted, to see which young woman would win the king’s heart.

“So it came about when the king’s command and his decree were proclaimed and when many young women were gathered together in the citadel of Susa into the custody of Hegai, that Esther was taken to the king’s palace [and placed] in the custody of Hegai, who was in charge of the women. Now the young woman pleased Hegai and found favor with him. So he quickly provided her with beauty preparations and her [portion of] food, and he gave her seven choice maids from the king’s palace; then he transferred her and her maids to the best place in the harem.” ‭‭(ESTHER‬ ‭2:8-9‬ ‭AMP‬‬)

Many young women were entered into the pageant, the competition was intense. With so many beautiful women gathered together in the same space, tensions, jealousy and envy must have burned at an all-time high.

However, the Bible does not depict Esther as being caught up in any drama or palace politics.

It feels like she just minded her own business and was restful about the whole thing.

The favor that she received from the eunuch Hegai appears to be supernatural too—God’s hand in this is evident in the “seven choice maids”, as 7 is the number of God’s perfection.

Are you in a situation where there are lots of competitors, many of them just as talented as you, and you need an edge over them?

Rely on God to grant you favor like He did for Esther.
God can turn the heart of a person of influence in your favor if you will trust in Him.

I personally believe that Esther was a believer in the God of Israel, that she would have prayed for her needs.

She would most likely have prayed for God’s favor in the beauty pageant, and her faith in His provision can explain why she never seems to participate in any scheming or politicking.

Look at the opulent way in which each young woman in the beauty pageant was prepared for the king:

“Now when it was each young woman’s turn to go before King Ahasuerus, after the end of her twelve months under the regulations for the women--for the days of their beautification were completed as follows: six months with oil of myrrh and six months with [sweet] spices and perfumes and the beauty preparations for women-- then the young woman would go before the king in this way: anything that she wanted was given her to take with her from the harem into the king’s palace. In the evening she would go in and the next morning she would return to the second harem, to the custody of Shaashgaz, the king’s eunuch who was in charge of the concubines. She would not return to the king unless he delighted in her and she was summoned by name.” ‭‭(ESTHER‬ ‭2:12-14‬ ‭AMP‬‬)

12 is the number of covenant relationship (twelve tribes of Israel, twelve disciples of Jesus) and 6 is the number of man (Man was made on the sixth day of creation, and 666 represents a man [antichrist] in his most depraved form, alienated from God’s nature).

In our covenant relationship with God (12-month beautification process), we depend on His favor, but that doesn’t mean that we do nothing and just sit there waiting for God to drop what we need from the sky.

There’s still a part where we have to walk, believing that His favor will flow in our lives as we are on the go.
His favor causes what we do to prosper and succeed.

Hence, the 6 months of oil of myrrh and 6 months of perfume.

Depending on God’s favor doesn’t mean that you only wait for the supernatural and miraculous and totally abandon the natural.

Esther still went through the beautification process like everybody else.

I’m sure she didn’t say “God is on my side and will grant me favor to win even without all this. I’m not even going to bathe or brush my teeth to prove that it’s all God’s favor!”

No, God can also use natural things to accomplish His purposes. The key is to be led by the Holy Spirit—do what He tells us to do. That’s godly wisdom.

So please carry on brushing your teeth, using moisturizer, whatever beauty products, and if your doctor has prescribed you medicine, carry on taking it unless God has clearly spoken to you that you don’t need to.

Now, read the following passage carefully because it reveals Esther’s secret of receiving God’s favor:

“Now as for Esther, the daughter of Abihail the uncle of Mordecai who had taken her in as his [own] daughter, when her turn came to go in to the king, she requested nothing except what Hegai the king’s eunuch [and attendant] who was in charge of the women, advised. And Esther found favor in the sight of all who saw her. So Esther was taken to King Ahasuerus, to his royal palace in the tenth month, that is, the month of Tebeth (Dec-Jan), in the seventh year of his reign. Now the king loved Esther more than all the other women, and she found favor and kindness with him more than all the [other] virgins, so that he set the royal crown on her head and made her queen in the place of Vashti.” ‭‭(ESTHER‬ ‭2:15-17‬ ‭AMP‬‬)

The name of Esther’s father Abihail means “The Father is Might”.
Esther relied on God as her might. She didn’t request for anything except for what Hegai the king’s eunuch advised.

In this part of Esther’s story, the eunuch represents the Holy Spirit.
True sons of God are led by the Holy Spirit and not by the Law which requires their own strength and ability.

Esther didn’t rely on her own smarts or understanding, but fully trusted in God to grant her favor:

“Trust in and rely confidently on the LORD with all your heart And do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him, And He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way].” ‭‭(PROVERBS‬ ‭3:5-6‬ ‭AMP‬‬)

By submitting to God’s authority, she was demonstrating true humility, qualifying her to receive grace:

“Surely He scorns the scornful, But gives grace to the humble.” ‭‭(Proverbs‬ ‭3:34‬ ‭NKJV‬‬)

Esther’s original name is “Hadassah” which means myrtle. The myrtle flower is star-shaped, having five petals.

The name she received later on, Esther, means star.

By relying on God’s favor, the star on earth (myrtle) was elevated to the heavens—from a common foreigner, to royalty in the palace!

In Chinese culture, we love to hear palace stories about how the protagonist goes through storms in life with lots of drama, using his or her intelligence and skills to defeat evil and attain happiness.

Such stories inspire us and make us feel like that person truly deserves the happiness that he or she received in the end.

This is fleshly because it champions man’s own abilities and methods. Oftentimes, such protagonists use underhand strategies that God would frown upon.

However, Esther’s story shows us that it is still possible for a story to be restful, smooth-sailing and still wonderfully inspiring.
It was none of her own smarts or efforts, and all of God’s favor.

You may begin as a star-shaped flower on earth, but when you rely on God’s grace (unmerited favor), the Lord will greatly exalt you in the sight of all—you become a rising star in the heavens to shine for His glory!

This devotional is just one issue from my ongoing Bible Study series for patrons on Patreon.
It’s called “New Beginnings with God” because the Holy Spirit wants to show us how to navigate this new year to go from a small beginning to a greatly increased end.

It’s not too late to join in now. You’ll receive the past 8 issues of “New Beginnings with God” and a new one every weekday in our GEM WhatsApp Chat Group when you become a “God Every Morning” tier or above patron on Patreon.

Additionally, my new ebook “Messiah’s Miracles—The Power of Having Faith in Jesus Christ” is almost ready. All GEM tier and above patrons will receive it too once it’s ready.

Here’s what a beta reader said about it:
“Thank you, Milton for the anointed sharing of the 37 Miracles of Jesus. Right from the 1st miracle, God dropped fresh revelations of His heart to me. It wasn't head knowledge that I experienced, I felt His personality, His loving heart's intents towards me. On top of that, there's also revelation of His healing power. Praise Jesus for transforming my heart and bringing me closer to Him through Milton's sharing.” - Ann Tan, GEM tier patron from Singapore

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